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[02 May 2005|09:25pm]
[ mood | accomplished ]

SO I HEARD FROM MATT DITTUS THAT LIVEJOURNAL IS THE COOL THING AGAIN AND MYSPACE IS SOOOO YESTERDAY!!!!!!  hahaha. I have a new boyfriend and his name is MIKE CATERINA<3 Hes soooo much better than my other gay boyfriends. We've been going out since january 21st.  Hes special <3.  My spring break sucked.. besides the fact that i got to sleep with him every single night.. i had softball EVERYDAY cept 2 days and those 2 days i had workkkkkkkkkk.  My best friends are still Nikki Alexis n Lindsay. Most of the time im with them.  Cant wait till summer.  Damn i cant even take this livejournal seriously anymore. HAH.  i wish i wrote in it all year tho bc its funny to look back n read all the retarded things that have happened.  ummm i need a car still.. I WANT A CELICA.. idk.. and i still need a prom dress.. weird.  I cant wait for PROMMMMMMM im going with mike obvoiusly and were going to wildwood and nikki cac n lindsay are staying in the same hotel<333333333... its gonna be super fun.  and then in the summer me mike nikki tom probably cac n lindsay are gonna take a road trip to vermont just us and that will be super fun too and then me n mike and some other people like matt might go to DOMINICAN REPULIC and that would be SUPER TOO.  bc there is a swim up bar... and stuff... umm mikes here bye.

in a pocket full of skies

[09 May 2004|11:05pm]
16 Bright stars| in a pocket full of skies

[22 Apr 2004|10:15pm]
I am laura, and i hacked onto carlyssa journal. cause im a hacker. today carlyssa and i played at 7ish. we went out with my pa to shoprite it was silly. then I took a crap in a bag and dumped it in the street. Im a sicko..

i love chris..

and she loves paul

<33 peace out fuckers
in a pocket full of skies

[15 Apr 2004|10:32pm]
[ mood | exhausted ]

Nothing special happened today. I actually like my classes this semester.. all of them. Uhh 1st period.. was first period.. 2nd period during gym me cac n ilissa spend the whole gym sitting down throwing a basketball at an electrical outlet. "I skunked" lmao. Eh.. 3rd period.. hmm i have a 10 page essay due for that class tomarrow and i didnt do it :\.. and 4th period..me n bree beat eachother up like always. Eh Tomarrow we have a game.. maybe we'll win. Hopefully. I need to go to sleep. Goodnight.


1 Bright star| in a pocket full of skies

[14 Apr 2004|02:19pm]
[ mood | crushed ]

Well.. it looks like I dont have a boyfriend anymore :\. I never thought it would come to this.

9 Bright stars| in a pocket full of skies

[11 Apr 2004|04:41pm]

in a pocket full of skies

[05 Apr 2004|12:37am]
[ mood | cranky ]

Uh so far spring break has been.. eh ok i guess. Whatver its basically controlled by softball. I have a fucking headache and im sitting here doing nothing. Im never happy anymore. Im never in a good mood.. im not myself anymore and i dont kno why. Whatever.. I guess im waiting for laura and chris to come over and we're probably gonna go out.. but there not gonna be here for a while. Lets see.. eh yesterday paul and andrew came over... the day before that? I think i hung out with my boyfriend.. and uh tuesday i went to veronicas n stephanie n willy were there. Our first game was wednesday.. we played southern. We won.. then yesterday was a make-up game and we played them again and lost.. so were 1-1 right now. Im not doing too bad.. i hitting pretty good for once.. i hope it stays and i actually get good again. Ok.. im so fucking bored. lkdjeos;dlc,zz,.nmcej,cmcvx. Heh paul bought me roses on wednesday. For no reason.. just because he loves me. I love him too.. but we're fighting now.. long story. Ok i guess im done.. writing.. for a while.. spring break is almost over.. this sucks.. ok bye..


C ar  ly  ss a

3 Bright stars| in a pocket full of skies

[03 Apr 2004|09:56pm]
[ mood | cold ]

Hi. Im at Paul's house. He's upstairs and im bored. Eh we went to mc donalds today and his efin car stalled 3 times. Ridiculous. Yesterday.. me n paul went out to eat and got a movie. THERE WAS NO PRACTICE TODAY! amazing. But theres practice fuking 745 tomarrow and we turn our clocks back so its really 645. kdjsfoiuje;slkdjfepi. I have a headache. Later

C       a        r                   y           s            s             a

in a pocket full of skies

[30 Mar 2004|08:54pm]
[ mood | full ]

I just got hom from Applebee's and im so full. Me Bree n Nikki b went after our scrimmage. I sucked like always. Today in English was so funny. Um pauls mad at me because i wasnt home for his hour break and now he said hes not comming over after work? Um ok whatever. Im tired so im going to sleep. Goodnight!

C a r l y s s a

2 Bright stars| in a pocket full of skies

[28 Mar 2004|10:45pm]
[ mood | sick ]

Hmm this weekend was pretttty fun. Saturday I had softball from 11 til 5. When i came home me paul laura, her boyfriend, n ALEXIS went to applebees for cacs birthday! Oh man it was the first time us 3 hung out in god knows how long. I have so much fun when Im with them 2. Haha omfg guess who we saw. Fucking Alex March. Lmao when we were leaving Lauras boyfriend Mooned them. He put his ass up to the window and some mexican like called the cops it was pretty funny. Today me n Laura went to the outlets and bought alexis ridiculous presents haha we had alot of fun tho. We bought paddle velcroe (how ever you spell that) things and played with them. We laugh about the most ridiculous things when we're together its histerical. Oh man I love her.  Hmm then we came home n made a cake and something else and me n Paulie hung out. Now i feel like im gonna throw up for some reason so i need to go to sleep. Ill see you tomarrow. Adios.

C    a    r    l    y    s    s    a    *

5 Bright stars| in a pocket full of skies

[27 Mar 2004|12:16am]
[ mood | loved ]

I love my boyfriend more than anything. Oh man no one will ever know how much I love him. Eh tonight was crazy. Me n Laura n her boyfriend hung out after gay softball scrimmage (yea I sucked once again). We went to mc donalds then to jims. Laura come back to my house n we hung out for a little then paul came over and we were fighting like crazy and then we a sudden made up and I started crying histerically in his arms. Man and my mother barges in the room yelling at me and paul to stop and that paul had to go home because of his liscenses (when we still had 10 minutes until 12) and i kept telling her to leave but she wouldnt even tho she saw me crying in his arms. It was ridiculous. hah then my dad called her drunk-o and she called him stoned-o it was kind of funny. Whatever alls i know is I love my boyfriend more than anything in the world and nothing will everr change that. :) Oh man this is the best feeling ever. Nothing will ever change what we have. Nothing.

I have fucking 3 hour practice tomarrow and then a scrimmage right after? so im going to be there 1045- like 7? wtf? Then tomarrow im hanging out with Paul. We're gonna go out to eat i think :o)
Oh, yea i forgot to mention this. Alexis was supposed to hang out with me n Laura to day for the first time in 30984 years because her parents made a bullshit "compromise" that said everytime alexis hangs out with someone other than me and laura she gets a day to hang out with us. Its the biggest load of crap I've ever heard in my life. Well, alexis hung out with lindsay last weekend so she figured shed hang out with us this weekend and her fucking psycotic mother turns around and says that it "didnt start until this week". Tell me this is a joke. Her mother wants her to make knew friends. She wants her to forget about us. Well just to let you know, that will never happen. Try as hard as you like, but im we're always going to be her best friends and this just in: I LIVE NEXTDOOR. You can never just stop her from being friends with me. Anyway when i heard her mother was doing that i started crying histerically. I couldnt take it anymore. The worst feeling in the world is having one of the most important thing in your life taken away and theres nothing you can do about it. I didnt do anything to deserve this. Im not a bad kid.

K now im in a good mood after having a day full of tears. Im so in love :)

C a r l y s s a 

1 Bright star| in a pocket full of skies

Just another day [24 Mar 2004|11:12pm]
[ mood | sleepy ]

Im so efin tired so im gonna write fast. Lets see.. I just came home from THE SIMONELLIS. Um Monday was gay i had a stupid scrimmage in 20 degree weather and i sucked like usual. Tuesday.. uh who knows paul didnt have work so we hung out. And today this beautiful day was wasted. It was so nice outside and i wanted to go play so bad but i couldnt because i was stuck on a bus on my way to old bridge to play SOFTBALL.  Its like the gods dont want me to play or something. As soon as i get an opertunity to like maybe show i dont suck as bad as it seems i fuck up. Wow and my coach sucks every last once of fun out of it. We're not allowed to talk on the bus. We sprint of we dont do certain things. Its just not fun anymore. Sports are supposed to be fun. I cant play unless im having fun. Travel softball was fun. I loved it and i did so good because of that. This is like boot camp. I really dont know how much more if it i can take. a;lksdoekjfs,dpoijecd;kljsdfoije;lksdfijep. Then after my game i came home at like 630 and hung out with Laura. lmao we were bored so we decided to throw brownies at cars.
Me: my brownie keeps crumbling in my hand
Laura: I cant stop licking mine

Okay im going to sleep.  GOODNIGHT

C a r l y s s a*

2 Bright stars| in a pocket full of skies

..this sick, strange darkness comes creeping on, so haunting everytime [20 Mar 2004|03:44pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]

Im so fucking sick of getting dicked over like im a piece of fucking shit. What the fuck. Does everyone really think that im something you can just walk all over? Because it really feels like that lately.

Anyway, yesterday was nice. We had a snowday and i had no practice and paul didnt have work. We went burger king and 390 different places. Then later on we went to the ocean county mall because we're both banned from freehold and then we saw Eternal Sunshine. Omg great movie. It was really freaky tho, but i liked it alot. Then we went back to his house. Eh, this morning i had practice at 8. Came home and slept. Saw paul for alittle. Now im stuck at home doing nothing. This is beautiful. Later

in a pocket full of skies

[17 Mar 2004|07:55pm]
[ mood | depressed ]

Yea today i stayed home because Im sick. Very sick. Couldnt stop throwing up. Yea so i didnt go to school or softball. Sigh yesterday i talked to aires. Oh yea, haha like monday or something he screamed at me angie n reibis because we "complain" and he said we're playing for JV. Fucking ridiculous so many people on that fucking team complain and us three get singled out and ratted on by the seniors who wanna score points with him because they suck and think it will make them play more. Who does that. Ugg whatever. Anway talking to that asshole just made me hate him even more. He's such a cocksucker. It just made me not want to play for him even more. SDPfiuaspiouafsdfSFIOUSPA. ok. um. He called my house today because my mom wanted to tell him i was sick and he fucking lied to my parents. He said he apoligize? ok he was the biggest dick to me and he expects me to want to talk to him? Oh yea and of course pauls name got brought up. Fucking idiot.

Oh yea. I just found out that im officially not allowed to see my best friend. Oh and her mom likes to read me and laura's journals all the time? I think its time to make this friends only. This is my personal thing and i can write whatever i want in it. Anyway she is not allowed to see me and Laura anymore because we're "bad kids". How heartless can someone be. Seriously, my best friend that i've spend almost everyday with since kindergarten, who just happens to live right nextdoor to me im all of a sudden not allowed to see? Ok First of all, If you dont realize what your doing to your kid than your blind. If you think that shutting her off from the world is going to make her a better person, than your wrong. This is the time she needs her friends the most. There is nothing someone can do to stop me from seeing my best friend. And if you even try, then you seriously have some issues. This is ridiculous, now i have to sneak around to see my friend? Oh you never know what goes on at the scanlon house. We're all such terrible people. Cant let her come here, we're all smoking crack and stuff, you know how it is. Man, theres so many thoughts going through my head right now, so many things that i can say. But this journal is "open to the public" and i dont want to start anymore trouble thatt we didnt start to begin with. hah. Anway monday night me and laura wrote her mom a letter, about how we feel. It wasnt mean or anything, and it took alot of heart to write. Laura's dad drove us over there and we dropped it off. I really hope she read it. Doubt it tho. Maybe she'll realize what shes doing to her own kid.

Man, i really have been having a shitty couple of months. Things just seem to be going downhill. :(


C a r l y s s a

2 Bright stars| in a pocket full of skies

[14 Mar 2004|10:25pm]

2 Bright stars| in a pocket full of skies

[14 Mar 2004|12:25pm]
[ mood | sleepy ]

Its sunday. I hate sundays. This weekend was pretty fun. Friday I slept all day and hung out with paul during his break and after he was off work. Saturday.. hmm we had a double header at 8 in the morning in wall. It was freezing. After that Laura n Trish came over and we played. We were dancing on the bed and jumping around like psycos haha. Then we went back to her house. We had fun. Today i had softball 8-11. I'm so tired. I think me and bree are going to the beach later tho. hahah. its gonna be like -20 degrees there.

(Pictures I found.. mostly from my sweet 16)

in a pocket full of skies

..yay!! [13 Mar 2004|09:28pm]

(I finally figured out how to put pictures on here.. yay)

2 Bright stars| in a pocket full of skies

[08 Mar 2004|08:20pm]
[ mood | tired ]

Errbody in da club get tipsy! This weekend was alright. Softball started. So much running, and im so sore. Geez ive never been this sore, not even from Field hockey. Lets see, what happened this weekend? Eh on Friday i had softball, all running for 3 hours straight. Then Me and Paulie hung out and went to KFC (we can only afford fast food hah) and then Ritas and then we got a movie and went back to my house.  Saturday I had softball, then on pauls break I went back to his house w/ him and then i came home and Laura came over and we stayed outside basically all night because it was so nice out. Then we went to visit Cac nextdoor because she was supposidly off punishment and her fucking mother got in our faces. It was ridiculous. She trys to tell me and Laura that we do drugs and we're alcoholics and we force cac to do it with us. Lmfao. It felt kinda good to get some of my feelings out tho.. haha. So Me Cac and Laura hung out for a little and we ended up having a lotion fight, because we're idiots like that hah and we always do stupid things when we're together :). Then on Sunday once again i had softball and came home and slept then on pauls break we hung out and then me and laura went with him to the outlets. I hate red bull comercials. They're so dumb.  I cant fucking wait until its summer and we can go to the beachhh and the boardwalkkkk every dayyy. Omg im So excited haha. Ok I gotta do work or whatever and them im going to sleep. THANK YOU AND GOODNIGHT

C a r l y s s a*

1 Bright star| in a pocket full of skies

[04 Mar 2004|09:12pm]
[ mood | shocked ]

How could people be so fucked up? Seriously how could our school be so fucked up? Some teacher is saying that paul attacked her. Who the fuck lies like that to get someone in trouble? Obviously he didnt, its too long of a story to tell, but seriosly that fat bitch should be dead. Now he could get expelled. Or he's thinking about dropping out. I really hope he doesnt. I kno its up to him, and i erally hope he makes the right decision. But i dont understand how someone could do that. People are assholes. Heh tonight me and laura went to the King of hearts thing. It was dumb. We saw that fat whore Ms Calabro, the one i who accused paul of doing that, and started talking shit to her. It was funny. In the autitorium when we first saw her we started screaming "Ms calabros a fat whore" and "you fucking bitch" hah then we went to get candy or something and she was there and I said "how could someone lie like that to get in innocent kid in trouble" and laura said something hah it was funny. Fucking bitch. I really, really hope all this doesnt happen. Oh no.. tomarrow is when my life ends. The first day of the softball season. Im dreading it. Ok i gotta do an essay. Bye

C a r l y s s a

2 Bright stars| in a pocket full of skies

I'm another day late and one year older [01 Mar 2004|07:23pm]
[ mood | melancholy ]

I can't figure out how to make my stupid journal look. Hmm. Paul's at work. How gay. I was suposed to go to softball tonight. No one could drive me. Im digging myself into a deeper and deeper hole with this thing. Bleh. Lets see... this weekend.. Friday me n Paulie hung out. We rented movies and stuff and went "out to eat" at Mc Donalds and got dollar menu food like always because its the only thing we can afford right now hah. Saturday I hung out with Veronica for the first time in god knows how long. Me her stephanie and willy hung out at her house and it was histerical. Her uncle was hilarious. Geez I couldnt stop laughing. I missed that girl. I slept there and went home at like 2 the next day. Me n Laura hung out and went to the outlets because it was like 60 degress. Paul had work. Now im waiting for him to have his hour break or whatever because hes got work till ten so hes gonna pick me up then. Lalala.  Im boredddd. 

I really miss cac =(. I havent seen her in forever. She was punished for 349874 months and then we finally started hanging out and then she got punished for another 329874 months and i havent seen her since . Me and her use to be together everyday, we grew up together. Now its like we barely know each other. She was that one person that i knew i could trust with anything, I knew that whenever i was upset she'd be the first one to cheer me up. Now the only time we talk is at the bus stop. Ok now im crying. The worst part is it was my fault. I never made any time for my friends and they just drifted away from me. And when i finally realized what i was doing and tryed to fix it she got punished for like 4 months and wasnt allowed to see any of us. And now shes punished again, and her parents wont even let her see me for less than 20 minutes. Now we're complete strangers. Its like a lost a huge part of me. Its like something was missing and i couldnt figure it out until rigtht now. My Best friend, My other half, My sister. I miss her so much =(

Okay now that theres make up running down my face i think i need to stop. Bye


C a r l y s s a*

4 Bright stars| in a pocket full of skies

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